It was love at first sight for Joe Biden. The young University of Delaware student had taken a spring break trip to the Bahamas and accidentally stumbled upon a breathtaking scene — Neilia Hunter, a Syracuse University senior, was sunbathing by a pool. This encounter marked the beginning of a love story that would see both incredible joy and unimaginable sorrow.
In his memoir Promises to Keep, Joe reminisces about that moment, saying, “When she turned toward me, I could see she had a beautiful smile and gorgeous green eyes. She was lit by the unforgiving journey of a full afternoon sun, and I couldn’t see a single flaw.” Such vivid imagery captures the enchantment he felt that day.
As their relationship blossomed, Joe found Neilia to be warm and grounded, unphased by his modest upbringing. Despite their differing political views — Joe being a Democrat and Neilia's family Republican — their love prevailed. The couple married in August 1966, seemingly embarking on a fairy tale journey that would soon turn dark.
Neilia's Impact on Joe's Political Aspirations
Throughout their lives together, Neilia played a pivotal role in Joe’s burgeoning political career. The couple shared ambitious dreams, including Joe's desire to become a trial lawyer before entering public service. Neilia was supportive, although she had her own hopes for him to aim for a seat on the U.S. Supreme Court.
As their family grew, so did their aspirations. Neilia gave birth to their first son, Joseph "Beau" Biden III, in February 1969, followed by Robert "Hunter" Biden in February 1970, and Naomi "Amy" Biden in November 1971. During this time, Joe successfully transitioned into politics, securing a position on the New Castle County Council in 1970.
Tragedy Strikes Just Before Christmas
December 18, 1972, was a day that would change Joe's life forever. While Joe was busy at his temporary office in Washington, D.C., Neilia was out and about with their three children, preparing for the upcoming holidays. Tragically, she was involved in a horrific car accident that claimed the lives of both her and their youngest daughter, Amy.
The impact of the crash was devastating, sending their family vehicle hurtling into an embankment. In an instant, the joy of their family was shattered. Neilia and Amy were pronounced dead upon arrival at Wilmington General Hospital, while Beau and Hunter survived but sustained serious injuries.
Confronting the Unimaginable
In the aftermath of the accident, Joe felt an overwhelming sense of loss. He recalled the moment he knew something terrible had happened as he watched his sister answer the phone at his office. When told of a “slight accident,” he immediately feared the worst: “She’s dead, isn’t she?” he asked.
Joe's hasty flight back to Wilmington confirmed his worst fears. Struggling to process his grief, he was consumed by thoughts of suicide but knew he had to stay strong for Beau and Hunter, who needed him. The investigation into the accident revealed that Neilia may have been distracted by the children in the back seat, adding to Joe's turmoil.
Finding Strength in Surviving Family
Despite the overwhelming pain, Joe eventually found a way to heal, focusing on his surviving sons. With the support of his Senate colleagues and his sister, he began to rebuild his life. His boys became the center of his world, and he channeled his grief into ensuring their well-being.
In 1975, Joe met Jill Jacobs, a fellow University of Delaware student, who brought new hope into his life. The boys encouraged their father to pursue a relationship with Jill, recognizing her importance in their family. Just before their wedding in 1977, Joe asked Jill how she could commit to him, knowing he still loved Neilia. Her response was simple yet profound: “Anyone who can love that deeply once can do it again.”
Joe realized that Jill's love allowed him to embrace life again, giving him the strength to be himself. Together they forged a new path, demonstrating that love can indeed bloom even in the face of tragedy.
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